Prayers into the void

I miss their smiles, the way their eyes lit up just seeing me walk down the street. Small hands gripping mine, holding on with the desperation of everyone who had ever let them go. I miss the noise, the busy hot chaos of survival on that two foot wide strip of brick. The irrigation hoses they washed their feet in. I don’t know if I want to help them or be them. Be in their days and forget all of the useless shit I’ve learned to finally feel part of something. I miss Ricardo’s crying eyes, Strider's confident bravery, Quay’s anger filling his little body from the pool of injustice he’s treaded his whole life in. The memory of them chokes my heart with longing to go back to a place I couldn’t leave fast enough. Their endless fighting and squabbling as I hand out peanut butter sandwiches, the only sharing I saw came from those without anything. In a world of greed and division I watched toddlers without parents make sure everyone ate and my heart will always belong to them for that. I hope they are safe, I hope they know how much love I hold for them, I hope they never lose each other.